This is a crucial time in our lives as we are all faced with forever-feeling decisions and the expectation to map out the entire course of our lives.
1. Be present. This is tough. Take the time to just be. Living mentally in the future only creates anxiety. Set goals, yes, and consider the future but accept where you are. Trying to figure it all out is fruitless and robs you of the present moment.
2. Stop comparing. I am guilty of this. Dont look at everyone around you to determine your worth. My mom always said there is always going to be someone more successful, richer, smarter, more successful, better looking, thinner, and so on. Focus on what you want and be grateful for what you already have and have accomplished. Find people who inspire you. We are all on different paths.
3. Stop caring what other people think. Other people's opinion of you and your choices is just that-an opinion, not the truth.
4. Tune in. We all have intuition, we just dont always necessarily want to listen. Pay attention to your gut feelings.
5. Dont wait for permission, approval or validation. Some people grew up with over-involved parents who guided their path and patted them on the back along the way. Now its time to be your own cheerleader. Give yourself the validation you are seeking and stop waiting for permission or approval to do the things you want to do.
6. Make choices. I know its tough because today we have an abundance of choices which often leads to making no choices at all. If you cant pull the trigger on a decision, find a way to build your decision making muscle. Weigh the odds, make a list, and my friend Jamie always says..take the advice of people who have the things you want!
7. Make mistakes. Fail till you prevail. With every disadvantage comes a seed of equivalent or greater benefit. I try to remember that and learn from it instead of beating myself up over it. Just try to do it better next time and learn the lesson.
8. Do things alone. Whats wrong with us that we forgot how to be alone? Learn to like yourself and your own companionship. Go to a movie alone, its really not that bad! Be open to discovery and be your own best friend. I like me, I really like me!
9. Build your tribe. All of us need one, and one that extends beyond family. Network, seek out mentors and call upon wisdom from older generations. I have a mentor and I swear he is a god send. He has a great career and a family and is an amazing father, he has been my rock and a fountain of wisdom and of all places I found him at work...not all older men are creepy or want to sleep with you, fyi.
10. Be of service. Contribute. You learn who you are and what you truly have when you give to others. Its what makes the world go round. It is in the act of giving that we receive the most.
Life is a series of transformation. Change is inevitable I've learned. Careers, relationships, friendships, money, houses, good times and bad will come and go.
* Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response. IN our response lies growth and freedom. And when you are free, you can fly*